I’m breaking up with my issues! You know, the ones that bully me, especially the ones about being a “responsible” adult. When did being a responsible adult become letting go of everything fun, the joy that life is made of? Come to think about it, those I love being around most are those that let go and love life much the way they did as a child. Children instinctively gravitate toward joy. While we must guide them through tantrums and manipulation to get what they want, in reality, it’s all the quest for joy and to retain what is their birthright.
Having raised three kids and having a fuller understanding of how we are programmed to “grow up” and “act like an adult,” I’ve decided I’m pressing the reset button, recalibrating the things I love, my desires and dreams. They matter! They mattered when I was five, they matter now. The joy of life is always there to be had. Nothing has changed except my age and what I’ve been told matters and what is expected of me as an adult.
We are born to crave new experiences, but it’s so sad that imposed beliefs and expectations bully us in to letting go of the very marrow of our soul, all that we love, in exchange for reigning in our emotions, desires and natural instincts – “adulting”. The sad truth is that this is what causes us to fear change. All for fear of how we will be perceived or of being rejected or judged. Isn’t it interesting how as a child we can’t wait to be considered an adult, and once there, find our soul craving to be that child that needed to experience everything around us, a wild imagination where everything is possible and the world is our playground.
As we grow older we “accept” reality. We’re told “you can’t have everything.” It is a reality that around the age of seven, begins to take on the emotions, beliefs and expectations of others. We are told to be a “big” girl or boy, that crying is for babies. I do believe it’s very important to teach kids not to be whiners and complainers, but expressing emotions and an inherent craving for life is a completely different thing. So, right off the bat, we are taught to limit what we feel and consequently deny our souls craving for life’s gifts.
Thus, begins the ignoring of the most natural instinct we are born with, the heart’s pull that guides and shows us the better way, the way of joy and passion – the souls’ jurney. We were meant to give in to the longing for love and freedom. Basically, the falling in love with life that a baby does from the moment they are born.
Settling and giving in to the limitations happens because it feels more comfortable in the moment and lends the perception of acceptance, but tragically disconnects us from our heart. That’s why as we get older, people become so disillusioned with life, can’t voice their passion, and somehow quit playing with life.
So, I’ll say it again; I’m done “adulating!” I will not succumb to the at-my-age mindset. Settling not only hurts my present way of living, my joy in every moment, it hurts my soul.
I have painted a new picture of what I want my life to look like, and guess what? It’s much like what I pictured as a little girl. I imagine all that I love, all that I dream and I will ponder how I want to feel, and ignore all the “adulting” rhetoric of how I should feel, and what I should do. I give myself permission to love what I love, be what I am and have what I want, experience what I desire, all while allowing an automatic, huge capacity for me to offer enormous generosity and compassion.
Any moment of any day is ripe with opportunity for change, for joy. But first, I must give myself permission to push the radical reset button, enabling permission to play and dream and laugh and rest. I give myself permission to be the lead character in my own movie.
Let me ask you, are you living in a starring role, or are you a supporting actor? What that means is that the moments of your day are either lighting up the life you want and others, or supporting the limiting life we’ve accepted.
Your heart is your compass, the same heart you knew as a child. It is full of light and love and joy, and the thing is, it’s infectious. It lights up everyone else’s life in the same way a child lights up a room and suddenly “adulting” is absent. The room and the hearts of those present melt in the experience of that authentic, abandoned heart of a child. No – this in no way means we can live with no pain or hardship, it simply is about the heart perspective you are living life through.
I’m
going to play my way into new experiences and opportunities, but play requires
that I release all expectations of outcome.
It’s all for the fun of it. I
want different results in my life and that means I will need to change the way
I think and behave.
I want you to see that when we break up with our issues, we create more space
to play and live into joy. Relying on
our “adulting,” supposed to’s and so-called knowledge, and ignoring our
intuition, our heart, is the fast track to no man’s land, the life you never
wanted.
Our intuition and instincts, just like a childs, have nothing to do with our perceptions of living as an “adult.” I wonder what would happen if we allowed them their rightful place in our lives? You heart never stops playing Truth or Dare, “adulting” does.
So, I ask you, what’s your truth and what do you dare? You can fall in love with life by asking that little child to come along for the ride.
With a wink and curious laughter,
Ruthie